There are some problems.
I think what it’s really about is separation, be it from an event, an experience, a feeling, a person or a place.
The fear that it will pass you by or worse still, that you’ll never get it at all.
You look forward to something so much, that you discount, you ignore the in-between moments of now and what’s to come.
Then it comes and then it goes.
Yet, just like the proverbial ‘Christmas Day’ it all goes too quickly and what you’re left with is torn paper and unfulfilled expectations.
It’s not that you no longer know how to live in the moment, it’s just that the moment never seems to fully arrive.
It’s life without living, it’s the moments you’re left with when you’re alone.
That is the problem when all is said and done, you are alone and you’re missing the moments.
Merry Christmas to you.
The thoughts behind it…
I always find it surprising that what I want to write and what I do write are very different things. I had a small vision of fear, that I was alone after Christmas and felt miserable. The moment passed and I thought I’d write about not missing the good times. It’s so much darker than I was thinking, yet it seemed to encapsulate those terrible times when you don’t quite reach the high you so wanted. It’s all over and you’re feeling worse than before, in fact you wonder what it ever was that you were looking forward to experiencing. It’s the sometimes of my past, it’s certainly not my present.